Baby Steps

Well, my plan to participate in errands this morning really backfired. I made it through the grocery store fine – probably about a half hour of walking. I made it to one end of Costco and back, but by the time we got to the checkout, I was done. My husband took care of everything and went to get the car while I sat on a bench in the cafe area. My back was killing me, my abdominal incision was pulling in every direction, and my breasts were sore. We did one quick trip to CVS; I couldn’t send my husband in because I wanted to pick out a certain type of gauze pads, so I had to walk around there a bit too. By the time we got home, I hobbled into bed and stayed there for about three hours. I tried to nap but couldn’t. Eventually, I came out to the couch where I just could not get into a comfortable position. No matter how I sat, my abdominal incision was so painful. I had planned to prepare dinner, but I let my husband do it. I ate and headed straight for bed.

Lesson learned. Baby steps. Walking from the bathroom to the bedroom is a huge difference from walking across a warehouse store! I should have known better. Now I’m in pain, I’m in bed instead of playing with my son (this is usually before-bed playtime and tv with mommy), and I’m overall feeling sorry for myself.

I posted a query to the FORCE message board to see if my lack of stamina seems normal. Here’s the conversation so far. As I said on the message board, my plastic surgeon made me feel like I should be more active. When I told him I’d stayed in bed all day to nurse that strained muscle earlier in the week, he said I need to be getting up and around. I do wonder if he assumes I’m lazy because I’m overweight; in fact I am a pretty active person. But it’s hard to know where the line is between pushing too hard and not doing enough. It sounds like these other women who are three weeks out are focused on resting.

What I probably need is more of a plan. I’m an obsessive planner, so if I had some sort of system that I used to gradually increase my activity level each day, that would probably help me. Maybe a pedometer would help, or just to keep track of time spent off my feet. I’m going to think some more on this.

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